dreg-heap:

Hey I saw you from across the bar but my girlfriend didn’t. Are you some manner of spirit

(via ysalamir)

babylon5:

maybe i like it when a female character is deeply flawed and responsible for countless deaths and so on and so forth. more female characters should be deeply flawed and responsible for countless deaths

(via jubileesbian)

huffylemon:

lokaror:

17 gnomes running up to your car in heavy traffic and disassembling it in record time leaving you with  just the steering wheel and seat one minute after they appeared

(via weaver-z)

librarycard:

https://www.lesbianism.com/careers

(via gayfandomblog)

txttletale:

there’s nothing they might be giants love more than writing songs with verses like “[tuba bworping] we met at the grave of gustave eiffel / she said ‘hey, what’s up with you?’ / i told her that i’m being sent to jail / for reading a giant squid Camus“

and then choruses like “[guitar being played into a tin can phone] put the weasel on your head (put it on) / you’re going to die alone (yeah!) / put the weasel on your head (yeah, yeah!) / you’ll have a weasel headstone [xylophone ding]”

and i think thats neat :)

pillsburysoyboy:

putting on the high vis corset and running in front of cars across a dark country road like a deer

(via magrittr)

memecucker:

St Andrew: I am not worthy to have the same manner of death as our Lord so if you must crucify me then may I request you turn the cross upside down?

Roman guard: Oh is this like a thing or something with you guys? We were just talking about how that Peter guy asked the same thing in Rome

St Andrew: What the fuck? Are you serious? This was my idea first and I told him about it and Peter goes off and does it before me?What a fucking asshole uhhhh what about an X shape can you do an X shape like that’s still a pair of wooden beams right

Roman guard: I mean, an X would be a entirely different thing and I’ve never designed something to asphyxiate hanging from an X but, ok you know what that sucks your friend stole your idea and did it first so sure we can make it work

(via manywinged)

dscgshauntingground:

Using american spellings when typing out direct quotes from academic literature but shaking my head the whole time so the oxford english dictionary popping up my laptop knows I disagree with it

(via hauntedmoors)

acrownofcandy:

you don’t know how great chairs are until you’re in a place with no chairs. actually you probably have an idea. you’ve lived a life.

(via andhumanslovedstories)